Tony Robbins Self Awareness Secret: Six Steps to Emotional Mastery
Anthony Robbins is an acknowledged expert in the science of peak performance and personal change. His bestseller Awaken the Giant Within is another one of those books you can pick up and open at any chapter and apply the techniques to your every day life. It’s an absolute must for your library!
In his book, Robbins explains a self awareness secret which examines six steps to emotional mastery which you can take very quickly to break limiting patterns, taking the lesson from a painful emotion and moving quickly forward.
The six steps of his self awareness secret are:
- Identify what you are really feeling
- Acknowledge and appreciate your emotions, knowing they support you
- Get curious about the message this emotion is offering you
- Get confident
- Get certain you can handle this not only today, but in the future as well
- Get excited and take action
1. Identify what you are really feeling:
So often people feel so overloaded they don’t even know what they are feeling. Does this sound familiar? Instead of feeling overloaded, step back for a moment and identify exactly what you are feeling. Are you hurt? Do you feel angry? By doing this and beginning to question your emotions, you can lower the emotional intensity you are experiencing.
You can then ask yourself questions like: Am I feeling rejected? Or am I disappointed, or feeling uncomfortable? By trying to identify exactly what you are feeling and why, you can lower the intensity and pain of the emotion even more. This makes it much easier to learn from the emotion you are feeling.
2. Acknowledge and appreciate your emotions, knowing they support you:
Don’t ever make your emotions wrong – this is a sure way to destroy honest communication with yourself and others. Just be thankful that you are being sent a signal that something is happening and some aspect of your life needs a change. By trusting your emotions, even though you may not understand them at the moment, they are there to support you in making positive change.
By allowing your emotions to simply “be” as opposed to making them wrong, you will feel yourself moving towards simple solutions. Whatever you resist tends to persist. Cultivate the feeling of appreciation for all emotions and you will find yourself calming down almost immediately.
3. Get curious about the message this emotion is offering you:
Getting curious helps you master your emotions, solve the challenge, and prevent the same problem from occurring in the future. What do you need to do right now to make things better? Here are four questions to ask yourself to become curious about your emotions:
- What do I really want to feel?
- What would I have to believe in order to feel the way I’ve been feeling”
- What am I willing to do to create a solution and handle this right now?
- What can I learn from this?
The more curious you get about your emotions, the quicker you will learn important distinctions about them.
4. Get confident:
Get confident that you can handle this emotion immediately. The quickest and most powerful way to handle any emotion is to remember a time when you felt a similar emotion and realise that you’ve successfully handled this emotion before. Since you have handled it in the past, of course you can handle it again today.
Use this previous experience as a checklist for what you can do right now to change how you feel. What did you do back then? Did you change what you were focusing on, the questions you asked yourself or your perceptions? Or did you take some kind of new action? Decide to do the same right now, with the confidence that it will work just as it did before.
5. Get certain you can handle this not only today, but in the future as well:
You need to get to a place where you feel certain that you can handle this emotion easily in the future by having a great plan to do so. One way to do this is to simply remember ways you’ve handled it in the past and rehearse the situation for the future. Repetitions like this with emotional intensity will create a neural pathway of certaity that you can easily deal with such challenges.
You can also jot down on paper three or four other ways that you could change your perception when these emotions come up again.
6. Get excited and take action:
Once you get through the first five steps, the final step is obvious. Get excited and take action! Get excited about the fact that you can easily handle this emotion and take some action right away to prove that you’ve handled it. Don’t stay stuck in the limiting emotions you’re having. Express yourself by using what you rehearsed internally to create a change in your perceptions and actions.
These six steps would have to be one of Tony Robbins best self awareness secrets – and he has many! With these six simple steps, you can master virtually any emotion that comes up in your life. If you find yourself dealing with the same emotion again and again, this six-step method will help you identify the pattern and change it in a very short period of time. And remember, the best time to handle an emotion is when you first begin to feel it – Tony’s philosophy is “Kill the monster while it’s little” – very good advice indeed.